Immodesty was once upsetting
TV commercials once put me at unease
But now the tighter the clothes the better
And a glimpse at the flesh never bothers me

I've become accustomed to darkness
I am beginning to find my way around

I've become accustomed to the stench
The filth has now become a home

I've become accustomed to the wine
Acquiring a taste for what
I once spit out of my mouth

How did this happen?
How did I regress so far?
How did this happen?
What can be done?

Well, just as I've gained weight
From months of bad choices and mistakes
It all can be reversed
But by no means over night

But if I continue to shun
The change will have begun
And the things of the world
Will once again be repulsive to me

Oh Lord help
This is so hard to ask
Since I never know
what shape it will take
But still I ask for Your grace

The light of the world is like a dimly light bulb
And I've learned to prefer it over the sun
Oh but no more Lord, please no more

We either choose to do what is hard now, or else later, we 're forced to do what is far harder. for example the man who avoids the inconvenience of filling his tires with air, may have a blow out or will have to get them replaced, which is a far greater inconvenience. It may seem difficult to resist the coke, cake and ice-cream, but it is far harder dealing with obesity and diabetes. It is a pain to do my dishes after every meal, but it is either this or later I'm forced to spend 45 minutes, to an hour, holding my nose and turning my eyes in response to the things growing on the plates on the bottom of the china mountain. We don’t want to save money for the things we want, not while we have have plastic and can have it now. Therefore, we're forced to pay off credit card debt that is a bit like... well, just imagine something really horrible. We are so used to the slavery of having to do the difficult, that this is how we live. Oh that we would choose to freely do the hard things now and never again be forced into submission to that which is WAY harder.

I am my own worst enemy
And I keep tuning the other cheek
I provide him the ammo to shoot me through
After insult and injury I forgive and take the noose

Right when I think I hate him
I find myself serving his every need
My spirits the door met when I welcome him in
He makes himself at home and I clean up after him

Yeah this is an abusive relationship
It would be nice to get out
But I have found it rather difficult
Since in me he is kinda trapped

I continue loving my enemy
Not with words but with deeds
I bless him even after he curses me time and again
I am so quick to forget how he keeps doing me in

Yeah this is an abusive relationship
It would be nice to get out
But the dye has joined the water
And the clear finds no way to escape

Cut out my eyes and he'll still show me his ways
Cut off my hands and his grip will continue in me
Cut out my heart and finally my spirit be able to leave
Cut off my head and my soul will finally get to breath

Yeah I hate this abusive relationship
But it will come to an end
My Saviors coming for me
To refine, redefine and to free

I want to be like a nose that can't handle sulfur
I want to be like teeth that can't handle what's cold
Like a rebel who stops his ears and turns his head
Like a child who is made sick just by the thought of spinach

Immorality be unnerving
Materialism turn my stomach
Filthy language put me at unease
Bad humor produce in me a frown

Lord I want to be sensitive
I want to feel shame again
I want to hate what you hate
So my heart would be one You love
A heart that can thrive in any environment
And cannot be corrupted by what surrounds
Oh God I want to hate what you hate
And I want to love what you love

So what if I start anew
Brush myself off and renew my vows?

I know my present state keeps me from Your word
But I have learned that even when I am free I abstain
For I only feel hungry when the chains bind me
When I am released I never want to eat

For what is freedom to do right
If our heart is not right?
Lord am I not right?

Anymore when I am freed from my captivity
Its just a short while before I climb back into my cage
lock the door, swallow the key
& I must wait until it comes out of me
Before I once again can be released.

Oh God you gave me over to the sin of my choosing
But Lord now in my moment of sanity hear me
Lord free from my deception
and take me back, please take me back

For God I've been happy in this state of sin
And have not felt the least bit of shame
Lord tell me why I've not even batted an eye
or felt any unease or inner pain
My spirit has been lulled asleep
Its like i've been enchanted to believe
that there is no higher purpose then self-pleasing

Oh God this is my confession
Hear me and forgive me
Pull me back in, awaken
and embolden me to fight

There is no reasoning with the enemy
No she must be thrust through
These is not arguing with the witch singing a spell over me
No she must be thrust through
I must take action,
I must take action in Gods name,
I must take action

Why should I care about what it seems
What really matters is what it is

Lord I am about all dense!
So blind to how things really are in the present

To sin can seem like such a small thing
The first compromise does seem a big deal
And I confess that how things seem
Has gotten the best of me
more times then I care to admit

But in reality, no sin is small
compromise #1 is the push of the snow ball down the hill
It only gets bigger and bigger until it kills
To sin is to sell oneself into slavery
Oh that is not small thing!

But how things are, are rarely how they seem
I rarely feel anything as far as the weight of these realities
And thoughts like I am having right now
Don't go very far in protecting me

Oh God I want to be in tune with You
May the renewing of my mind actually transform me!
May it all sink past the mind into the rest of me!

Gray is the path to the black Pit